


For When...

by givemesumaurgravy



Category: Love Simon (2018), Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: (Bram writes a porn letter), College, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Love Letters, M/M, Open When Letters, slight angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-05-09 12:14:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14715854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/givemesumaurgravy/pseuds/givemesumaurgravy
Summary: Bram and Simon are off to college, and knowing that it's going to be hard, Bram gives Simon a stack of 'Open When..." letters to help him when things get tough.





	1. When When We've Just Said Goodbye

Simon was 99% sure he had run out of tears and he was probably going to be dehydrated for the rest of the next two days. Saying good-bye to Bram was probably the hardest thing he ever had to do, and really, it’s not like he’s actually even saying good-bye. Their schools are an easy hour and half train ride apart. 

That doesn’t change the fact that they won’t see each other every day though and wrapping his head around that is very, very difficult. 

Simon closes his bedroom door and immediately flops down on his bed. He presses his fingers into his eyes, taking a few deep breaths as he lays on his back, trying to focus on anything other than the empty feeling eating a hole in his chest. 

Simon lays there until he feels his phone vibrate in his back pocket. Simon shifts so he can fish it out, and he feels something indescribable swish through him when he sees Bram’s name on his screen, telling him he has a text. Then two more come through.

**Bram:**  
_I’m sorry that was so hard, baby._  
_Don’t forget about the present I gave you. It should help.  
_ _So, get off your bed, Si, and go read the first one!_

Simon smiles at his phone and then forces himself to get up and pulls out the stack of letters from the side pocket of his duffle bag. Simon had felt so guilty when Bram had showed up with the wrapped present when they went to the park this morning because he hadn’t thought to give Bram anything - thought they’d already covered that when they each gave the other one of their old shirts and hoodies to snuggle with when they get lonely. 

Still, it was sweet and Simon thanked Bram profusely, then promptly burst into tears when he realized what Bram was giving him.

Simon had heard about gifts like this, mostly from people with military spouses or significant others, that the one staying behind would send a stack of ‘Open When…’ letters with their deployed spouse so they would have something to read from their loved one whenever they needed it. 

Simon didn’t realize this was exactly what he needed until he had it in his hands. 

“Bram… this is… this is so wonderful,” Simon had said as he turned the incredibly thick stack of envelopes over and over in his hands. 

Bram had just simply kissed Simon and they went back to enjoying their last fleeting moments together. 

As much as Simon wants to be greedy and read every letter right now, he knows he won’t. Instead, Simon reads the outside of the top envelope and holds his breath as he carefully tugs it loose from the stack.

_For when we’ve just said good-bye._

Simon admires Bram’s painstakingly neat handwriting for a moment and then gently opens the envelope, careful not to tear it too much. Inside, there is a single piece of folded, lined paper. Simon unfolds it and closes his eyes for a moment before he opens them again and begins to read. 

_Simon,_

_Even as I write this, weeks before I have to head to school, I know today’s going to be so hard. I can’t really wrap my mind around it, not yet, but know that whatever you’re feeling right now, I’m probably feeling, too._

_I just want you to know that I love you, Simon, so much, with everything I have. I know I’ve told you this time and time again, but maybe putting it in writing will make it seem even more real - I’m so glad you sent me that email last year. It was so fearless of you to just put yourself out there like that, and I have always admired your courage, Simon, even if you don’t see yourself that way._

_You’re the bravest person I know and loving you has made me a braver and better person. Before you say it, I can already hear you - ‘Bram, you were already a wonderful person’. I really wasn’t, but you can keep thinking that. I was afraid, until I met you. You’ve taught me to love myself, probably without even realizing it._

_You’re the best part of my life, the best part of me. Being with you has been the greatest adventure, and I can’t wait to continue this adventure with you, even if it gets hard._

_I’m going to try to keep this positive, because I think that’s what we both probably need right about now. College is going to be so great. You’re going to learn so much, Simon, meet so many wonderful new people, experience so many new and wonderful things. Go and enjoy, knowing that I’ll be here to hear all about it and hopefully share a few good stories of my own._

_We’ve got this, baby. If I know anything, I know us, and we’re going to kick ass at this whole long distance thing. If we can survive being the only openly gay couple at our school in the heart of Georgia, we can do this. (Apples and oranges, I know, but still.)_

_On that note, I’m going to end with I love you, and remember I’m always a call or text away._

_You have my heart, Simon Spier, I know you’ll keep it safe._

_Yours,  
Bram _

Simon doesn’t realize he’s crying until he sees a teardrop soak through the center of Bram’s letter. Simon hastily wipes his eyes and then laughs at himself. Simon picks up his phone, quickly typing a reply to Bram.

**Simon:**  
_You bastard you made me cry again._  
_I love you._  
_That was everything I needed._  
_We’re going to crush this.  
_ _ <3 _

Simon flops back down on his bed, though this time, he’s feeling warm and happy. Simon lays there until his mom calls him down for dinner, and he goes downstairs with a smile on his face.


	2. For When It’s The First Night Before Classes

It had been a whirlwind of a weekend and by the time Simon had time to himself to sit and process, he realizes he had been so busy that he hadn’t had time to miss his family (or Bram) or to really freak out about this whole first-time-on-his-own thing. 

Maybe that’s why they do huge orientation weekends like this.

Simon’s alone in his room now. His parents and sisters had stayed as long as they could on Friday to help him get settled and then left when Simon’s roommate's family did. The rest of the weekend was a complete blur, but Simon enjoyed himself. He’s not totally sure where his roommate Shawn is, but he’s thankful that he has some time alone to decompress. 

Simon takes his time showering and then getting ready for his first day of classes tomorrow. He makes sure he has his textbooks, notebooks, and pencils and sets his laptop on the charger so it’s ready to go in the morning. 

By the time Simon lays down in bed, he feels exhausted physically, but his mind won’t seem to shut off just yet. Simon had talked to Bram on the phone briefly after dinner, and upon looking at the clock, he realizes that Bram is probably asleep already. 

As Simon lays in bed, he starts to feel himself panic about everything that he’s gotten himself into. He wants to be brave and mature and suck it up, but before he knows it, he feels tears start to prick his eyes and he rolls over and reaches for the box under his bed. 

Simon finds what he’s looking for quickly and riffles through the dozens of envelopes before he finds one he’s searching for. 

_For when it’s the first night before classes._

Simon sighs in relief as he opens the letter and sees Bram’s neat handwriting filling the page. Simon takes a moment to appreciate Bram’s endless thoughtfulness before he begins reading. 

_Dear Simon,_

_If I know you, you’re probably lying in bed right now trying not to let yourself freak out too much about what’s coming tomorrow. I also know you probably wanted to talk on the phone, not specifically about ‘your feelings’, but just to talk and calm yourself down. I’m sorry I’m probably already asleep and not here for you. Hence the letters._

_You’re going to do so well tomorrow, baby. You’re ready for this. Think back to when you got your class registration information and how excited you were for all your classes (yes, even Statistics). Don’t stress too much about the little stuff. Show up early, smile at new people, take copious notes, and don’t be afraid to ask questions or offer your input! Everyone else in your classes is most likely in the same boat as you - nervous for their first day. Think how good you’re going to feel tomorrow night when the first day jitters are behind you and you can just enjoy everything Haverford has to offer!_

_I can’t wait to hear all about it tomorrow, babe. You’re going to rock it._

_All my love,  
Bram _

Simon closes his eyes and holds the letter to his chest for a moment. Simon honestly doesn’t know what he did to deserve someone like Bram. He feels exponentially better now, so he folds the letter back up and tucks it back in the box with the rest of his letters. 

Shawn comes in just as Simon is settling back into bed and they make small talk as Shawn gets ready for bed. As they chat, Simon realizes that he can do this. 

As soon as Shawn turns out the light and Simon closes his eyes, he’s fast asleep until morning.


	3. For When You’re On The Train Coming To See Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whooooops this one got a way from me with like, actual plot.   
> (which I guess is not really a problem? I just am not dedicated to a full fledged fic right now. I like keeping this low key and just like snippets here and there, if that makes sense)
> 
> anyways! enjoy!

The first two weeks of college fly by in a blur. Simon quickly finds himself making friends and catching on to a bit of a routine, and before he knows it, it’s the Thursday night before Labor Day weekend, and he’s packing to go see Bram for the first time.

Simon knows realistically, it’s only been two and a half weeks since they last saw each other, but he still finds himself wondering if Bram will look any different or if Bram will think _he_ looks different. Simon honestly feels like he’s already changed so much (it’s a wonder what being out and proud with no fear of South Georgia homophobes does for one’s self-confidence and soul). 

Simon wonders if it’s had the same positive effects for Bram. 

(He hopes so.)

Shawn is also going out of town for the weekend to visit his girlfriend, so Simon puts on a ‘packing playlist’ and the two of them pass twenty minutes singing along to The Bleachers (bless Shawn’s stellar music taste) and packing and then re-packing their suitcases when they don’t close on the first try. 

The last thing Simon slips into his backpack is the letter Bram had written just for this occasion.

Simon would be lying if he didn’t admit that the curiosity got the better of him and as he was about half way done moving into his dorm room two weeks ago, he had paused and dug out the thick stack of Bram’s letters and settled on his just-made bed and started flipping through them.

What striked Simon then and still leaves him in awe now is all the planning that must have gone into this. Bram had to have been working on it for _weeks._ He had also impressed Simon that Bram’s really thought of everything. There are sweet letters _(for when it’s our anniversary),_ romantic ones _(for when you need a reminder of how much I love you),_ ones that make Simon blush _(for when you’re feeling naughty),_ and then there are the ones Simon hopes he never needs to read _(for when we’ve just had an argument, for when you’re worried we won’t make it (we will))._

Simon wanted so much to just tear through them and read them all right then and there, but he knew that that would spoil it and he loves Bram too much to ruin it all like that. 

Even now, he will save this letter for tomorrow, as it says _For when you’re on the train coming to see me._

They go to bed early that night as they have one early class and then Shawn and Simon will head to the train station together right after. Simon should have known though that he wouldn’t be able to sleep. 

Simon tosses and turns for a while before he gives up and pulls out his laptop and starts reading through his old emails from back when Bram was still Blue. Simon doesn’t do this often because it usually makes him feel all sorts of things and afterwards all he wants to do is cuddle with Bram and hold him for hours, but he indulges tonight knowing he’ll get to do just that tomorrow. 

Simon falls asleep peacefully after that, not waking up until his alarm goes off promptly at 7:00am.

Class passes record-breakingly slowly today, but Simon tries not to complain because soon, _(so, so soon)_ he will be with Bram again. That being said, Simon can’t help the anxious thrum running through him that doesn’t quite tame itself until he’s settled on the train and it’s moving towards its destination. 

Simon waits a solid seven and a half minutes before he’s greedily tearing open Bram’s letter. He waited until he was sure it was alone in his section of the train, not wanting to share any of this with anyone else, no matter how selfish that makes him sound. 

Simon doesn’t pause this time, just starts reading immediately once he’s managed to free the letter from the envelope. He realizes this one is longer than the first two, and part of him wants to savor it, wants to make it last the hour long train ride, but he’s far too greedy right now and knows he’s going to devour it all right now.

_Dear Simon,_

_I cannot really imagine what it’s going to feel like, how you must be feeling right now, how I’m probably feeling right now. I want to try and imagine the excitement and impatience we’re both probably feeling, but to be honest, I can’t really wrap my head around it right now because where I am, you’re a phone call away and I’m seeing you tonight for our cheesy anniversary picnic in the park. I can’t imagine what it will feel like anticipating seeing you after having spent more than a few days max apart._

_I think I may just kiss you and not stop for the whole time we’re together. Prepare yourself._

_I don’t know if I’ve told you this before, but I am so proud of you, SImon. I know it was so hard for you to tell me you wanted to try out Haverford instead of being in the city with me. I know you didn’t want to let me down or disappoint me, because we had made so many plans about being in the same city and talked endlessly about how great it was going to be to do college together. I’m proud of you for recognizing what you needed and wanted and being able to stick up for it, even if it made us adjust our outlook and plans a bit._

_I’m glad you went for it, Si. I’m sure you would have loved NYU, but like you said when you broke the news to me, Haverford ‘is made for you’. I truly hope is everything you dreamed it to be. You deserve it._

_I’m excited even now for you to read this letter more than most because I know we’re both in a place of excitement and joy in anticipation for seeing each other again. I hope you feel how much I love you as you’re reading this. If it was possible to put it into words, I would, but I don’t think they’ve invented a word yet to describe just how much I love you._

_If I know anything about myself, I know future Bram has probably planned out every minute of our time together in the city. Remember, though that I’ll be happy doing anything with you, because it’s you and really I just want us to enjoy spending time together again. If you’d rather stay holed up in my (probably) too small dorm and binge Netflix while getting reacquainted with each other, just say the word and I’m yours. You know that._

_(And just so we’re clear, by ‘getting reacquainted’ I do mean sex. Lots and lots of sex.)_

_I know the train ride is about an hour or so, and I know you’re a restless traveler when you’re not the one driving, so I hope you’ve got your playlist going and you are able to sit back and relax a little. I know you, and I know that’s going to be challenging when you’re so wired and excited to see me, but just try for me, yeah?_

_In case you can’t relax and need something to pass the time, I think you’d enjoy the following Youtube searches: cute sleepy puppies, baby elephants, and mischievous kittens. Be prepared to share your favorites with me when you see me._

_I love you Simon and I can’t wait to see you._

_And if I didn’t let it slip already, I’ll be waiting at the train station with the full out obnoxious chauffeur get up. Hat, suit, sign and all._

_All my love,  
Bram _

Simon waits for a moment to let his smile die down before he pulls up Youtube and starts looking up cute animal videos, per Bram’s suggestions. The time does pass much quicker than he thought and he does feel a lot more relaxed by the time the train pulls into the station. 

Simon grabs his bag and backpack and deboards the train, trying not to run anyone over in his excitement. Thankfully the train isn’t that crowded at this time in the early afternoon, so Simon is able to get out rather quickly. 

When Simon sees Bram, he nearly drops everything and runs to him. He also almost bursts into happy tears. Almost. 

Bram is standing there on the semi-crowded platform in a full black on black outfit, with a freaking chauffeur's hat and a sign with a single name _Jaques._

They make eye contact and it’s like everything stops for a moment. Then it comes back at hyper speed as Simon runs to Bram and throws himself into his arms. 

“God, I’ve missed you,” Simon breathes as he squeezes Bram tighter. 

“Me, too,” Bram whispers back.

Simon’s not really sure how long they stand there embracing, but it doesn’t matter. All that does matter is that he finally has his boy back in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to all of you who have commented suggestions! I love reading them and have added them to my List. (it's at like 50+ right now... so... definitely more to come!)


	4. When When We've Just Had Our First Fight Apart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGH THE ANGST
> 
> that's...that's really all I want to say

Simon hangs up the phone and throws himself backwards on his bed. He’s thankful that Shawn is gone for the weekend so he can be pissed off and cry in peace.

It’s not like he and Bram haven’t fought before, mostly over stupid stuff, but a few times over more serious things, but this is different. This time they’re not in the same city and they can’t just… talk in person and work it out with a long heart to heart and cuddle session.

Simon hates this.

As he lays on his bed staring at the ceiling until it blurs with hot, angry tears, Simon tries to pinpoint the root of their fight. He can’t remember who started it or what was the trigger, but it was like before he knew it, they were both yelling and so angry and he hung up before he could consciously recognize what was going on.

Simon could blame a lot of things, but he can’t help but feel guilty for choosing to go to school so far away instead of in the same city like they had originally planned. The distance is hard, and he’s pretty sure that’s the real issue here, even though neither of them openly admitted to it. 

Simon remembers suddenly that he’d seen a letter in Bram’s gift with something about fighting. He debates it for a moment, wondering just how seeing Bram’s words would affect him right now, but he decides he owes it to Bram to read it.

Simon rolls so half his body dangles from the bed and he reaches to get the letters. Simon finds the one he’s looking for quickly and holds it in front of himself for a few minutes, just staring at it. 

_For when we just had our first fight apart._

Simon can probably guess what Bram wrote, but instead of thinking about it, he just tears open the envelope and greedily takes it Bram’s words. 

_Dear, Simon,_

_I think this honestly is the hardest letter for me to write and I’ve been avoiding starting it. (What, me? Procrastinate? Shocking, I know. That should show you how hard it is for me to imagine us not being okay.)_

_It would be easy for me to just write that it’s my fault, that I’m sorry for whatever I said or did, but the reality is that’s not fair or accurate. I can’t realistically apologize for something I know nothing about. What I want you to get out of this letter is a reminder of how insanely crazy I am about you. I love you, Simon. Whatever we fought about is not going to change how ridiculously in love with you I am._

_I know it’s has to be hard to have an argument and not be able to see each other during or after. I remember many times when we’d argue over something stupid and it would be so easily resolved by one of us showing up at the other’s window an hour later. I’m sorry we can’t logically do that now._

_I’m not going to give you any advice on how to resolve this, because truthfully I don’t have any. All I can say is breathe, Simon, and remember I love you, even if you can’t feel it right now. I know you’re probably still hurting, and I probably am, too. Take your time. You and I both know I’ll be there when you need me._

_You’re everything to me, Simon, my light, my life, my world. Whatever it is, we are going to get through it. It just may take some time for us to work through it on our own before we’re ready to forgive each other. That’s okay. We’ll be okay. I know you and I know us. Whatever it is, we will be able to make it better, even if it doesn’t seem like it now._

_(And, lastly, don’t even go there, trying to blame yourself for any of whatever happened because you picked Haverford. You needed to do that, and we’re strong enough to make it through the distance. Trust me.)_

_Put on your good headphones and one of your playlists and get some rest, Simon. Everything’s going to be okay. (I’m hoping if I say it enough times you’ll finally believe it.)_

_I love you,  
Bram _

And Simon’s crying again, though this time it’s not angry tears. Simon picks up his phone immediately and texts Bram.

**Simon:**   
_Fuck, I love you so much._   
_I’m not ready to talk yet, I just needed you to know that._   
_Can I call you tomorrow?_

Bram’s reply comes a few minutes later.

**Bram:**   
_Of course._   
_I love you, too. With everything I have._

So Simon gets out his good headphones and puts on his acoustic playlist and falls asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU for all the love and ideas you all have been sending in! I love them and want to write them all (eventually) 
> 
> feel free to keep commenting what you want to see next or just come say hi!
> 
> love you all long time~~


	5. For when you're so horny you can't think

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ugh sorry this is unedited, but it's late and I have to get up early and need to sleep! please don't hesitate to point out any glaring errors :)
> 
> Also this one is very dirty, so enjoy ;)

Three weeks in, and Simon doesn’t know if he can wait any longer. Of all the letters that Bram wrote Simon, there’s one that is constantly in the back of his mind, one that he can’t seem to stop thinking about. 

Simon wants to wait, wants to save it for when he _really, really_ needs it, but also… he’s _so fucking curious._

Also Shawn is out for the weekend, so he really has no excuse not to do this. 

He’s in the middle of studying, or at least trying to, when he can’t focus anymore and he has to get the letter out. Simon stares at the box peeking out from under his bed from his seat at this desk, pencil eraser caught between his teeth. Simon tries counting down from ten and refocusing, but it doesn’t help.

“Fuck it,” Simon mutters and drops his pencil to his desk and pushes back in his chair. 

Simon ducks and pulls out the box, immediately finding the letter he’s looking for. Simon bites his lip as he closes his eyes for a moment, checking himself before he pulls it out and sees Bram’s familiar handwriting.

_For when you’re so horny you can’t think._

Simon needs to know what Bram wrote. They’ve never been big on, like, sexting or any of that stuff, but there’s something about knowing Bram wrote something dirty, something X-rated for his eyes only, that drives him a little crazy.

Simon flips the letter over, hesitating again, wondering if this is really the right time, if he should wait until he _really_ can’t stand it, can’t concentrate because he’s so turned on and can’t do anything else… but Simon thinks he may just be there right now. 

Simon presses the heel of his palm down on his crotch which is feeling quite uncomfortable. Simon bites his lip and closes his eyes for a moment before taking a deep breath and opening the letter. 

Simon’s hands are shaking as he opens his eyes and upfolds the letter. Simon blinks as he tries to get his eyes to focus on the words, the words swimming on the page as he tries to focus on breathing right and keeping his hands steady. 

_My Simon,_

_Wow. So, I think I knew I wanted to write this letter from pretty much the very beginning of forming this idea. To be honest though, it’s one of the ones that’s taken me the longest to write._

_You always tell me I’m so good with my words, but I don’t know if you realize that it actually takes me a long time to get it right. I suppose being a perfectionist has it’s benefits._

_I’ll start by trying to imagine what you’re like right now. I bet you’re sitting on your bed, probably still dressed, but hopefully not for long. I know you’re probably hard, the kind of hard where you ache and are leaking. God, I love it when you get so turned on that you make a wet spot on the front of your boxers. I love getting your pants off and seeing that you’re already so ready for me._

_I love getting you naked. I love you getting me naked. I love being naked with you._

_That probably means you should take your clothes off now._

_If you need more direction, start with your shirt. Imagine me pushing it up and kissing your stomach, then your chest, then your nipples. I love your nipples. I love sucking and biting them. I love the noises you make when I do._

_Now for your pants. Imagine me getting my mouth on you the second a get your pants open. I love tasting you and feeling your through your boxers. You always taste so good and feel so good on my tongue. I’d tease you for a while, because I love it when you get all desperate and needy. I love to make you beg._

_Next, slip your pants and boxers down. If you want, get under the covers, or don’t if you’re feeling brave. I know you can have a bit of an exhibitionist kink, don’t try to deny it, I know you, Si._

_I think if I were there with you, I’d start by blowing you, slow and sensual. I’d be done teasing you now, seeing you all neey gets to me, you know that. I’d take you deep, savoring the feeling of you hitting the back of my throat, hoping I don’t gag too much._

_(You better be touching yourself, by the way. Get out the lube I know you have hidden somewhere and go for it. I know you don’t need my permission or anything, but really, baby. I want you to. If it helps, I’ll probably need to jerk off, like, three different times while writing this.)_

_We’ve gotten better at the whole stamina thing, but I know you still can’t last too long when I get my mouth on you. Pretty soon you’d be begging me to start opening you up, and so I would. I think I’d start with my tongue. I know we’ve only done it a few times, but I loved it, honest. It was so fucking hot._

_You make the best noises any time I get my tongue on you, Simon. Seriously. It’s the hottest thing._

_I’d start adding my fingers, one at a time, opening you up for me. I’d try to be quick, but I love you and don’t want to hurt you, so I’d make sure you’re okay before anything continues._

_Once you tell me you’re ready, I’ll roll you over, pulling you up by your hips so I can take you from behind. You know it’s one of my favorites. I love the way you arch your back and have to bury your face in a pillow, trying to hide your moans._

_I think my favorite thing though is that moment right when I enter you. If I was any sort of artist, I would draw a picture of the face you make and take it with me everywhere I go. It’s absolutely breaktaking. I can’t always see it this way, but all I have to do is close my eyes, and I can picture it._

_Can you picture it, Si? Can you imagine what it felt like the dozens of times we’ve done this? I hope you can. I hope this letter is doing this justice._

_After a while, I’d pull out, roll you over again, and watch you carefully, taking it all in as I push in again. This time, I’d listen to you, always begging me to go harder, faster. We’re both close now._

_Are you close, Si?_

_With just a few more thrusts, I’d have you coming all over your stomach. You’d beg me to come inside you, I know you love it when I do, so I would. God, the sight of my come dripping out of you… there are no words._

_Afterwards, I’d clean you up, I’m sorry I’m not there to do it for you. Then I’d hold you, let you fall asleep in my arms. You’re always so cuddly and sleepy afterwards, it’s adorable. Wrap yourself in a blanket and imagine it’s me holding you. I know it’s not the same, but try for me, yeah?_

_I love you, Simon. I know you know it, (I mean, isn’t writing someone 800 words of porn a clear sign of that?) but sometimes it’s just nice to see it clear and proper._

_Feel free to call me, too, if you just need to hear my voice. I’m always here for you, baby._

_All my love,_   
_Bram_

_P.S. Seriously, though, clean the come off your chest. It’ll cause a rash again if you leave it too long and I’m not there to rub cream on it like last time._

Simon read the letter three times through, two loads covering his chest by the time he’s finished. Simon lays there afterwards, staring at the ceiling as he tries to calm himself down. 

After what could be ten minutes or closer to thirty, Simon finally stands up and cleans off his stomach. Then Simon grabs his phone and climbs back into bed, dialing Bram’s number. 

“Hi, baby,” Bram says as he answers. 

“I read it,” Simon blurts. 

“Okay?” Bram says. “You’re going to have to be a bit more specific, love.”

“The… letter,” Simon says. “The, uh, the porny one.”

“Oh. Oh,” Bram says and Simon can practically hear the embarrassment in his voice.

“God, Bram it was so hot,” Simon says. “I just… I wanted to hear your voice now. I’m… I miss you so much.”

“I miss you, too, baby,” Bram says. “Remember we get to see each other next weekend, though.”

“I know,” Simon says, smiling. “I’m going to start brainstorming how I’m going to repay you.”

“Oh, I can think if a few ways,” Bram says and Simon giggles. 

They talk for a little bit longer until Simon feels his eyelids getting heavy. They say goodbye and Simon gets ready for bed. When he crawls back in bed that night, he feels happy and relaxed. It’s the best he’s felt in a long while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~ spread some love in the comments ~~


	6. For whe you need a laugh

_For when you need a laugh_

“Hey, baby.”

Simon sighs and closes his eyes, the sound of Bram’s voice on the other end already calming him down. 

“Hi,” Simon says, long and drawn out. 

“What’s up? Is everything okay?” Bram asks and Simon knows he can just tell he’s having a terrible day by his tone.

“Not really,” Simon says as he throws himself backwards onto his bed. “I’ve just been having a bad day.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Bram asks. 

“I don’t know. I just really wanted to hear your voice,” Simon says, closing his eyes and imagining that Bram is there next to him, instead of miles away. 

They talk for a bit, Simon feeling better by the second the longer he listens to Bram talk about his day and after about half an hour, Simon feels infinitely better. 

“I have to go now, Si,” Bram says after a pause. “I have workout with the team.”

“Okay,” Simon says, some of the negativity from earlier already creeping back in. 

“There’s a letter that I think might help,” Bram says, seemingly sensing Simon’s foul mood from earlier returning. “Pull them out and see if you can find it. It’s for when you need a laugh.”

Simon rolls his eyes fondly and leans over his bed to pull out the box of letters. He flips through them and finds the one he’s looking for. It’s a bit thicker than some of the others, so Simon’s curiosity is immediately piqued. 

“What did you put in here? It’s bulging,” Simon says, turning the envelope over in his hands a few times. 

“Open it and find out,” Bram says. “Call me later if you need, okay?” 

“I will. I love you,” Simon says. 

“I love you, too,” Bram says softly and then hangs up.

Simon doesn’t waste any more time and tears open the envelope, dumping out a stack of notecards onto his bed. 

Simon grins, not really sure what this is, but intrigued that it’s different from the previous letters he’s opened. Simon grabs the stack of cards and begins reading the top one. 

_Dear Simon,_

_Whether it was a bad day or a stressful week that brought you to opening this letter, I hope these jokes can help bring a smile to your face today and any other time you might just need a laugh. I had a lot of fun collecting these jokes, so I hope they bring a smile to that beautiful face of yours._

_I love you, Simon._

_Love, Bram_

Simon flips over the first card and finds that the rest of the cards consist of a brilliant dad joke with a question on the front and then the answer on the back. After reading the first, Simon starts grinning uncontrollably and greedily reads through the rest of the stack. 

_Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?  
Great food, but no atmosphere._

_What do you call a fake noodle?  
An impasta._

_Why was the mushroom invited to the party?  
Because he’s a fun-gi._

_How many apples grow on a tree?  
All of them._

_How does a penguin build its house?  
Igloos it together._

_Why did the scarecrow win an award?  
Because he was out-standing in his field._

_Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?  
Because they have no body to go with._

_What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter?  
An irrelephant._

_Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?  
It was two tired/_

_Why is the graveyard so overcrowded?  
People are dying to get in there._

_What’s brown and sticky?  
A stick._

_Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?  
Because they’re so good at it._

_What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?  
A carrot._

_What do you call a marathon for pastors.  
A rev run._

_What do you call it when two chips fall in love?  
A relation-dip._

_What state has the smallest drinks?  
Mini Soda. _

_Who is the best kung fu vegetable?  
Brocc Lee_

_What do you call a wintertime contract?  
A Santa Clause. _

_I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport. I’m just doing it for kicks._

When Simon gets to the last joke, he lays back down and reads through them again, giggling to himself and smiling so hard it hurts. 

After taking a few more minutes to revel in the warmth that Bram’s gift gave him, Simon sits up and sets the stack of jokes in his desk drawer for safe keeping and later use. Next Simon finds his phone then and texts Bram.

**Simon:**

_You are such a dork._ _I love you._ _Thank you._

Simon sets his phone down on his bed and gets out his homework, still smiling to himself. What had seemed like an unless mound of impossible homework ended up not being that hard after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why didn’t T-Box from TLC never exfoliate her skin?
> 
>  
> 
> She don’t want no scrubs. 
> 
>  
> 
> (as always, comment anything you want to see with this fic!)

**Author's Note:**

> I would love for you lovely readers to send in any requests/ideas/suggestions you have for future letters! I'm slowly compiling a list of ideas, but I would enjoy your input as well!
> 
> until next time! <3


End file.
